Tag Archives: historical crack

Go home, Tennessee history, you’re drunk

From John Sevier’s (Tennessee’s first governor) Wikipedia entry:

“Following his inauguration, [John] Sevier encountered [Andrew] Jackson in Knoxville, and an argument ensued in which Sevier accused Jackson of adultery for his marriage to Rachel Donelson. An enraged Jackson challenged Sevier to a duel, which Sevier accepted. The duel was to take place at Southwest Point, but Sevier’s wagon stalled at Campbell’s Station en route to the duel. As Jackson returned to Knoxville, he encounted Sevier’s entourage. The two loudly exchanged insults, and Sevier’s horse ran away, carrying his pistols. Jackson pointed his pistol at Sevier, who hid behind a tree. Sevier’s son pointed his pistol at Jackson, and Jackson’s second pointed his pistol at Sevier’s son. Members of both parties managed to resolve the incident before bloodshed took place.”

It will never not be hilarious how many of this country’s founding fathers either killed each other or tried to in duels. Some of them were a little more competent than this, though.

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“It’s four peepol like you dat keep it turned onnn”

So, I bought a used copy of the Le Roi soleil soundtrack on Amazon. Because I am sad and an embarrassment to humanity.

PRANCE, CHRISTOPHER MAÉ, PRANCE!

Apparently some of these same people (or at least Merwan Rim) are touring another one of these rock operas on the life of Mozart. It looks like a complete train wreck. I must own it.

Oh Emmanuel Moire, you are so pretty. But you are never, never, ever allowed to sing in English again.

It’s so obvious that neither one of these people has any idea what the words they’re singing actually mean. The inflection’s all over the board, and the pronunciation is comical. Kind of strange, seeing as how it’s Elton John. I thought everyone worldwide knew all the words to Elton John. 😛

I must write a French rock opera. I must. I need to find a completely, COMPLETELY incompatible topic. Then put it to a lame pop-hip-hop beat with lots of synthesizers and AutoTune. IT WILL BE GLORIOUS.

“Does this pike make me look fat?”

Kate Beaton’s done a series of strips on the French Revolution. As usual, they are glorious and Wrong.

And, yes, TJ. That Revolution was super creepy.